Before we get started on this blog...I have an update! I was minding my own business at work, when I get a text from a number I don't know. Guess who it was?!?! The bartender from the speed dating night! I'll keep you all updated on that if it goes anywhere.
On to the next blog entry.
In college I worked at a brand new, luxury, student living complex for three years. When I first started the apartments weren't even built yet, but when they were finished my sophomore year, everyone moved in...all students. Can you imagine 500 something college students under one complex brand new apartment complex? It was basically Animal House. Parties Parties Parties. It was fun, and I met a ton of great people, but boy do I have stories...
We'll call this first guy the NJB...short for, Nice Jewish Boy.
Like I said earlier, I met a ton of people. Everyday I would meet new people, give them tours, and hopefully write up a lease for them. One night, after everyone had moved in, I was at a party at one of the apartments. I was 21 at the time, so I was drinking. beer pong, king's cup, and flip cup were the games of choice.
Lots Of Beer!
Anyways, my friends and I decided to head over to another apartment...to another party. We're all walking to the elevator and all of a sudden this guy and his friends pass and he says:
NJB: Hi Sarah!
Me: Hi?
**I didn't recognize him really but if I'm told a resident's name, 9 out of 10 times, I could tell you what apartment they lived in..I know, weird..so I asked
Me: What's your name?
NJB: Bryan Goldman (I changed his name for privacy reasons but it was as Jewish of a last name as Goldman...and I must have helped him with his lease at some point)
Me: Oh yeah! Hi...You're Jewish!?
NJB: Yeah??
Me: It's ok! I'm Jewish too!
**It's kinda like I have Jew-dar for guys.
NJB: Oh no way! Are you full?
Me: Full? of what? Beer? Yes!
NJB: No! hahah full or half Jewish?
**While this conversation is happening, I'm in the elevator trying to keep the doors open to have this convo. Here's a short clip of what it was like...but imagine the doors closing and us pulling them open about 5 more times...and it didn't seem as awkward at the time :P
Me: Ohhh! I'm full Jewish lol
NJB: Cool! I'm half. We should hang out sometime.
Me: Yeah! (finally the elevator doors had enough and just closed on us)
I never saw the NJB again.
No, I'm joking...we did hang out a couple times and he was pretty cute! But...I guess college and work caught up to me and we just kinda stopped hanging out.
This next story is about having the truth come out...after the fact.
Sooo, while working at the apartments, I studied...a lot. I meeeaann...I was in the study rooms a lot...maybe not actually studying but having fun. Sometimes other people would come into the study rooms and we'd have a dance party...
Anyways, after I graduated and moved on from the apartments, I went back down to San Diego for a visit. My best friend and I went to a bar when we saw him!
The one guy who Duggied with us in the study rooms! We'll call him Duggy! Before I could process that he was there, I get swung around and hugged.
Duggy: Hey!!
Me: Hi!
Duggy: Remember?! I was the guy you danced with in the study rooms?
Me: Oh yeah!!
Duggy: You know what me and my friend used to call you? **He's clearly drunk right now**
Me: What? I'm scared to hear.
Duggy: You were the "short, hot girl with big boobs who worked in the office".
Me: 0_o Really?!?! The first word you'd use to describe me is short???
My BFFL: Are you serious Sarah?? He just said you were hot and you just took away the short part?
** For everyone who doesn't know me...for the record...I'm only 5 feet tall so I've gotten "short" a lot!! It's exhausting to hear after 24 years :P
Anyways, I love my SD! Holllaahhh!
On to the last story! We'll call him, Material Boy...or MB for short!
This actually happened just a few weeks ago in Los Angeles. I thought I had heard everything....until this happened.
I'm out at the bar for my friend's birthday when a guy came up to me.
MB: Hey!
Me: Hi
MB: Can you feel my shirt...do you know what material it is?
Me: Noooo I don't know..
MB: IT'S BOYFRIEND MATERIAL!
Me: Wow!
Turns out, I gave him my number hahah
Anyways... I have been getting a lot of stories from you guys! Here is one story from a woman who..is now married BUT had to go through some pretty bad dates, before she found the one...so there's hope!!!
Here's one woman's Story:
This was a first date. We went for lunch then to Home Depot because he wanted to see how we would
get along?? i thought it was weird but whatever...then we went back to my place which was a BIG
MISTAKE and he took off his pants while I was in the other room! When I came back into the room he said he wanted to show me his birth defect. He had two holes on his penis.
Nuff Said.
Don't forget to email me any stories you may have TheUnitedDatesOfSarah@gmail.com
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Don't forget to check in next Monday to read about - The Fire Fighter!
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