The United Dates Of Sarah - Your First Time Is Awkward - Entry 7

By this blog entry I feel like you know me pretty well, but you don't know about the very entertaining story of my first kiss. To start this story, I have to preface it by saying that I'm a very driven person. When I was younger, my goal in life was to get into college so my mindset in junior high and high school was basically "why get into a relationship when I'll be leaving for college soon?" With that being said, I obviously wasn't on the prowl at all. Just keep that in mind. 

Ok, now for the story. I had a really good guy friend in high school...yes, I didn't have my first kiss until high school...I know I know. 

Anyways, my best guy friend, we'll call him Slash. Why? Because he loved Slash.
 So, we were best friends in high school and then one day I got a message on MySpace. That's right, Myspace. In the message he basically declared his love for me and as a teenager, I thought this was obviously so sweet! Unfortunately, I couldn't get it out of my head that we were just friends. Yeah I know, I friend zoned him! 

BUT my mom says this to me a lot: "at first I didn't like your father like that and then I gave him a chance." 

Sooo I gave him a chance. For one month, NOTHING HAPPENED. No holding hands, no kissing, nothing. Maybe it was because we had both never been in a relationship before and we were both nervous or because we didn't want to ruin the friendship we had. For me, it was all of the above, but it wasn't like we were trying either. Slash never looked longingly into my eyes or pretended to stretch and then put his arm around me....nothing. It's like we were still just friends. 

Then on one fateful night, I was over at his house. His parents were gone and we rented a movie. Ready for this? It was "The Exorcism Of Emily Rose". Yes, it was his choice obviously. Anyways, we were watching and I had to keep turning away because that shit was cray.

It all changed though at this scene.  

I turned to him with a disgusted look on my face thinking to myself, "you seriously thought this would be a good movie to watch?" But I guess he thought that would be the perfect time for our first kiss. He lead with his tongue. It happened so quickly that I didn't even know what had just happened and it was so wet and nothing like I thought my first kiss would be like. 

I pulled away really quickly and once the movie was over I got up to leave. It was super awkward after that. He walked me out to my car and I gave him a hug goodbye. I knew at this point I wouldn't be able to un-friend zone him sadly. I just felt like a kiss should have sparks and feelings behind it. I shouldn't have felt disgusted or like I never wanted to kiss anyone ever again! 

So, the next day I texted Slash asking if I could come over because I needed to tell him this wasn't going to work out. Unfortunately he just knew what I was going to say so he said "no".

Me: Fine, I'll call you in a little bit.

Slash: No

**Fine! I'll just text him a breakup!

Me: Hey Slash. I don't think this is going to work. I hope we can still be friends

Slash: Ok

I log onto Myspace and his new status reads "Single and ready to mingle"  

Sooo mature! 

Unfortunately, I knew this was going to ruin our friendship and the next day it even got worse. A girl came up to me and said Slash was spreading rumors. 

Girl: Everyone thinks Slash broke up with you because you wouldn't do anything with him. 

Me: Really? 

I was so angry...and long story short...Slash and I didn't talk for 3 years.

Fortunately we both matured and realized that the kiss was horrible and it was all a misunderstanding. High schoolers love to twist the truth and who cares really? 

Now we do talk every so often and share our dating stories...which are unsuccessful on both ends so far :P 

Now here's a short story from a reader:

I went on a date with this guy. We met somewhere and then he wanted to go to the beach so I go into his car and we drove to the beach. That was my first mistake. Never get into a guys car on the first date who you've never met! Anyways. We're at the beach and we walk and walk and walk to an area where no on is. He then asks me, "Do you mind if I take my clothes off?" I told him "yes, I do mind"...but guess what, he starts taking his clothes off anyways! So he stands in front of me when he's done and asks, "So, what do you think?" I told him, "Yep, it's a body. Now can you get dressed and pull the car up?" He actually did! He could have just driven away and left me there but he didn't. Anyways, that was our first and last date -_-

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**Creepy text face! WTF?

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**If you didn't get this, like me, they're asking for a threesome!