The United Dates Of Sarah - Did He Really Just Say That - Entry 6

A little change of plans. I know I told you I was going to write about a fire fighter this week, but like most girls, I changed my mind :P This week will be about the guy called "better late than never".

You know the saying "you get what you pay for"? Well for free online sites like OK Cupid or POF, I've found that to be somewhat true. Although I'm sure the free sites can turn out some good candidates,  it hasn't been promising for me just yet.

Anyways, about two months ago I started talking with this guy from OK Cupid and he seemed really nice. In most of his photos he was smiling and having fun with friends. Unfortunately we both got busy and stopped talking until last weekend when he texted me again. He apologized for dropping the ball and wanted to know if I was free to meet up and I was! This is why I call him Better Late Than Never. Anyways, that night we decided to meet up at a local bar...

For me, being a happy and an excitable person is really important. I don't want to date someone who finds it hard to smile or find good in situations.

So I get to the bar and I text him asking if he was there yet. He said he was sitting by the bar. For me, I know this might sound picky but we've never met before so maybe standing outside of the bar waiting for me would be a good idea instead of me searching through people that could be you. I finally found him in a corner, and I smiled and gave him a hug...Do you want to know what he did? He didn't smile and he didn't say anything. He just gave me a hug and sat down...and looked like this -_-

Me: Ok, do you want to find a place in here we can sit and talk?

Better Late Than Never: Umm. *sigh* sure

Me: What about here?

BLTN: Ok.

He was a man of few words I guess.

So we sit down and we're provided with free popcorn but we ordered drinks too. I asked if he had been waiting a long time before I arrived and he just said no.

It was like pulling teeth with this guy...TALK!

So we're making small talk and there's no emotion in his eyes...it seemed like he didn't want to be there at all but I didn't want to just get up and leave and be rude so I was trying to stick it out.

Me: Umm so what kind of movies do you like. What's your thing?

BLTN: Porn

0_o

Me: What?

*Maybe he said horror and I misheard it...

BLTN: Porn. Like pornography. But I guess if I had to choose like another thing, maybe movies that make me think like "A Beautiful Mind" or something.

Me: Ohh ok.

So at this point I'm making eye contact with the waitress like, PLEASE BRING THE BILL ALREADY! But unfortunately she wasn't getting the hint.

So another twenty minutes go by and I'm still pulling teeth! So I finally say..

Me: I think we should grab the bill...I have to get home because I have to work tomorrow

BLTN: Ok, well you can go.

*This might sound nice, like he was "letting me off the hook" or something, but it wasn't

Me: I mean, I'll wait...

*I didn't want to be rude and just leave him with the bill..how awkward

So we're waiting and he's just looking around not saying anything. Finally the bill comes and as a good human being I ALWAYS ask if I can pay...however...let's be honest...I'm kinda old fashion and chivalry is still a thing in my head and paying for a girl is part of being a man. But, if I'm dating someone, and we're kind of serious...I'll actually pay for things...but not on a first date...right?!?

Anyways, this is how it went down.

Me: So can I pay for my drink?

BLTN: Ok.

Me: -_-

BLTN: I mean, I guess I got it

Me: Ohh thank you so much!

As we're leaving I'm asking myself why??? There are so many lies online. He wasn't anything like his profile lol...Can I just meet a normal guy??

So we get outside and I thank him and give him a hug and he asks me where I parked.

Me: My car is right here

**And I point to a car right next to me...but it wasn't my car. I just didn't want him to feel obligated to take me to my car cuz then it would be another minute of awkwardness.

BLTN: ok well bye

And we never talked again...

The End :)

Don't forget to email me any stories you may have TheUnitedDatesOfSarah@gmail.com

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The United Dates Of Sarah - Don't Judge A Book By Its Cover - Entry 5

Before we get started on this blog...I have an update! I was minding my own business at work, when I get a text from a number I don't know. Guess who it was?!?! The bartender from the speed dating night! I'll keep you all updated on that if it goes anywhere.

On to the next blog entry.

In college I worked at a brand new, luxury, student living complex for three years. When I first started the apartments weren't even built yet, but when they were finished my sophomore year, everyone moved in...all students. Can you imagine 500 something college students under one complex brand new apartment complex? It was basically Animal House. Parties Parties Parties. It was fun, and I met a ton of great people, but boy do I have stories...

We'll call this first guy the NJB...short for, Nice Jewish Boy.

Like I said earlier, I met a ton of people. Everyday I would meet new people, give them tours, and hopefully write up a lease for them. One night, after everyone had moved in, I was at a party at one of the apartments. I was 21 at the time, so I was drinking. beer pong, king's cup, and flip cup were the games of choice.

Lots Of Beer!

Anyways, my friends and I decided to head over to another apartment...to another party. We're all walking to the elevator and all of a sudden this guy and his friends pass and he says:

NJB: Hi Sarah!

Me: Hi?

**I didn't recognize him really but if I'm told a resident's name, 9 out of 10 times, I could tell you what apartment they lived in..I know, weird..so I asked

Me: What's your name?

NJB: Bryan Goldman (I changed his name for privacy reasons but it was as Jewish of a last name as Goldman...and I must have helped him with his lease at some point)

Me: Oh yeah! Hi...You're Jewish!?

NJB: Yeah??

Me: It's ok! I'm Jewish too!

**It's kinda like I have Jew-dar for guys.

NJB: Oh no way! Are you full?

Me: Full? of what? Beer? Yes!

NJB: No! hahah full or half Jewish?

**While this conversation is happening, I'm in the elevator trying to keep the doors open to have this convo. Here's a short clip of what it was like...but imagine the doors closing and us pulling them open about 5 more times...and it didn't seem as awkward at the time :P

Me: Ohhh! I'm full Jewish lol

NJB: Cool! I'm half. We should hang out sometime.

Me: Yeah! (finally the elevator doors had enough and just closed on us)

I never saw the NJB again.

No, I'm joking...we did hang out a couple times and he was pretty cute! But...I guess college and work caught up to me and we just kinda stopped hanging out.

This next story is about having the truth come out...after the fact.

Sooo, while working at the apartments, I studied...a lot. I meeeaann...I was in the study rooms a lot...maybe not actually studying but having fun. Sometimes other people would come into the study rooms and we'd have a dance party...

Anyways, after I graduated and moved on from the apartments, I went back down to San Diego for a visit. My best friend and I went to a bar when we saw him!

The one guy who Duggied with us in the study rooms! We'll call him Duggy! Before I could process that he was there, I get swung around and hugged.

Duggy: Hey!!

Me: Hi!

Duggy: Remember?! I was the guy you danced with in the study rooms?

Me: Oh yeah!!

Duggy: You know what me and my friend used to call you? **He's clearly drunk right now**

Me: What? I'm scared to hear.

Duggy: You were the "short, hot girl with big boobs who worked in the office".

Me: 0_o Really?!?! The first word you'd use to describe me is short???

My BFFL: Are you serious Sarah?? He just said you were hot and you just took away the short part?

** For everyone who doesn't know me...for the record...I'm only 5 feet tall so I've gotten "short" a lot!! It's exhausting to hear after 24 years :P

Anyways, I love my SD! Holllaahhh!

On to the last story! We'll call him, Material Boy...or MB for short!

This actually happened just a few weeks ago in Los Angeles. I thought I had heard everything....until this happened.

I'm out at the bar for my friend's birthday when a guy came up to me.

MB: Hey!

Me: Hi

MB: Can you feel my shirt...do you know what material it is?

Me: Noooo I don't know..

MB: IT'S BOYFRIEND MATERIAL!

Me: Wow!

Turns out, I gave him my number hahah

Anyways... I have been getting a lot of stories from you guys! Here is one story from a woman who..is now married BUT had to go through some pretty bad dates, before she found the one...so there's hope!!!

Here's one woman's Story: 

This was a first date. We went for lunch then to Home Depot because he wanted to see how we would 
get along?? i thought it was weird but whatever...then we went back to my place which was a BIG 
MISTAKE and he took off his pants while I was in the other room! When I came back into the room he said he wanted to show me his birth defect. He had two holes on his penis.

Nuff Said.

Don't forget to email me any stories you may have TheUnitedDatesOfSarah@gmail.com

And Follow Me On Twitter @UntDatesOfSarah and like the Facebook page: www.Facebook.com/TheUnitedDatesOfSarah

I post new blogs ever MONDAY! If you're interested in subscribing, scroll all the way down and it should say "subscribe" :) 

Don't forget to check in next Monday to read about - The Fire Fighter!

The United Dates Of Sarah - Things You Don't Want To Do On A First Date - Entry 4

**Spoiler Alert** You might not want to read the following blog if you have no idea what "The Wolf Of Wall Street" is about and you still want to see it. I'm not going to divulge any crazy secrets about the movie, I'm just going to talk about his life and the decisions he's made with drugs, family and work. No, this blog isn't a review on the movie...it's about the guy who reminded me wayyy too much of Leonardo Dicaprio's character in the film.

It all started on Jdate. One would think because you pay for this site, you might get the best of the bunch. Well, that's what I thought and it had worked once before. It was December 2013 and love was in the air with the holidays coming up so I hopped on the computer like any normal single would do during this time, and I had a new message! 

I opened it up and looked through this guy's profile. Wow, he looked normal! And kinda cute! And Jewish...hmmmm too good to be true? Nawww 

So we messaged back and forth until he finally asked to go out on a date. BUT you should know that I'm a very busy person and also the girl! If you're going to ask a girl out, PLEASE be the man and pick the place. It doesn't take much planning, maybe just a phone call for the reservation. Yes, you can ask me what food I like, but then after that, you plan the date! I guess I'm old fashioned in that way but it just shows creativity, effort, and initiative. 

Ok, so he asked me where I wanted to go. Fine, that's not a deal breaker but I was a little bummed. 

I told him I didn't care because I pretty much like all foods. He couldn't think of a place so I just chose the best place I knew closest to me. It's a place where you can cook your own meats in the middle of the table. It's really good and I figured it would be fun. 

So I finally get there and I see him. Great! He looks just like his pictures. First obstacle of online dating, overcome!

We go into the restaurant and the hostess tells us it'll be a while until a table is ready so we go to the outside area to talk. This is where it gets weird.

There's plenty of room on the benches so I sit down. So far I've made no indication I was into this guy yet. I mean, I didn't even know him. BUT he decides to sit directly next to me. And I'm not just saying next to me, I'm saying like thighs touching, way too close for a first day, close. I try to scoot into the corner a little bit more but I'm literally cornered in. Ugh, this is going to be awkward.

We're talking and I'm just leaning back the whole time because he's just so uncomfortably close. Honestly, I can't really remember what we talked about at this point because I was thinking too much about how to inch myself back a little. I know we did talk about family and our jobs but nothing too exciting.

THEN IT GOT WEIRD! 

Our table was ready so we followed the hostess to the booth and my date just stands there and looks at me. And then he says, 

Date: So how do you want to do that? 

Me: Do what? 

Date: How do you want to sit? 

Me: **Kinda rude** What are you talking about? 

Date: Like, do you want me to sit next to you or across from you? 

**I'm shocked he's asking me this because everyone knows you sit ACROSS on a first date! How am I supposed to talk to you if you're sitting next to me?? But I'm so surprised he's asking me this, I just say: 

Me: Umm I don't care

And then I made a crucial mistake! I went into the booth first and then HE FOLLOWED sitting right next to me. 

Ok, this is going to be a long night.

So we start talking and it's weird, really weird. I can't quite put my finger on the problem, but this guy is definitely off a little and then he says,

Date: Have you seen "The Wolf Of Wall Street"?

Me: Yeah, it was good but I feel bad for the guy.

Date: What do you mean?? He had the best life!

0_o

       

Me: What? He screwed people over, he was addicted to drugs, and cheated and ruined his family. How is that the best life? 

Date: No, he was rich, had the best cars, he had the most beautiful wife and yeah, he did so many drugs!

**He was totally serious by the way and at this point, I knew we weren't a match. I mean, anyone who has eyes could see that Jordan Belfort's life was screwed up. He wasn't really happy and he never really felt emotions because he was always high. Yeah, his wife was pretty and he had a grand things, but what good is all of that if they're just going to be taken away in the end? 

Anyways, I decided by now that I was just going to have fun with it. Kind of like speed dating, although this occurred before speed dating. 

Me: Ok, so you think he had an amazing life? Have you done drugs like that before? 

Date: Although I'm studying to be a lawyer, don't be fooled. Drugs were great in undergrad. 

Me: Like, what drugs have you done? 

And his answer sounded a little like this:

Me: Wow

Date: Yeah but I made it through and it was just a college thing I guess. Now I just do the soft stuff.

Me: Ohhh Kayyy

So as we finish up the meal, I was ready to go.   My posture and body language was saying that I was not interested and I had given this guy NO SIGNS that I was interested.

As we were leaving, I tell him that my car is just around the corner and I thank him for dinner, but he decides he wants to walk me to my car. I guess if the date was good, I would appreciate that he'd be walking me to my car. Unfortunately I was just ready to go home.

Me: No, it's ok. Thank you though for dinner.

Date: No, I'll walk you.

Me: K

As I'm putting on my jacket, and using both of my hands to do so, he grabs one of them and starts holding it. I'm kind of awkward because I'm just soooo shocked. Why does he think the date warranted a hand hold??
Ok...I'll just limply have my hand in yours. I didn't want to be mean or rude and I thought that's all he wanted. Right?!?

WRONG

We get to my car and he just goes for it. Before I even knew what was happening. It didn't last long, but a kiss was already wayy to much! Whyyyyy???


Ughhh...we say goodbye and then I get in the car where I did the following:

I was so shocked! What made him think I was interested at all?? Maybe I should have just told him that I wasn't feeling it during dinner or on the walk to my car but in the moment, it all happened so fast.

After venting to my mom and a couple more good friends, I finally came to peace with the fact that that was a bad date...
and then, he texted me.

I had to wait until the next day when I was at work to get advice from co-workers on how to let him down easy and this is what we came up with.

I never heard from him again, but hey...you live and you learn.

Don't forget to email me any stories you may have! www.TheUnitedDatesOfSarah.blogspot.com

And Follow Me On Twitter @UntDatesOfSarah

I post new blogs every MONDAY! If you're interested in subscribing, scroll all the way down and it should say "subscribe" :)

Next week's entry will be about first encounters! Nuff Said.


Now, enjoy the following messages I've received  :) 

This is a legit question but why lead with it? I don't even get a "hi" or "How are you?"