You guys! It's been too long and sooo much has happened. Let's catch up a bit. First of all, I'm going to be an aunt in about 3 months! And guess what...it's a boy! Do you know what that means? It means he's going to grow up with me telling him exactly how to treat girls, how to be a gentleman, how to be that night in shining armor, that Ryan Gosling to someone's Rachel McAdams...kinda like this
Anyways, that's a big thing..
Soooo this blog entry is going to be a little different. This is going to be an open letter to my future nephew Eli that I hope he reads around the time of dating age.
Let me just start with this quote:
"If the person you're dating doesn't add to you, they are taking away" - Unsure who said it, but I like it.
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Dear Eli,
I'm sure you're reading this letter thinking, what does my crazy Aunt Sarah have to say now and why am I in your blog? Well, you should only be so lucky.
Anyways, I'm here to give you some tips and tricks about how to treat the special someone you end up dating.
For the most part I have been treated well in relationships but just recently I felt what it's like to be treated like a hookup, like a person with no feelings and no one should be treated that way.
Your mom and dad have only ever dated each other which is very rare and unless you're as lucky as them, I'm sure you'll have some heartbreak in your life too and you should always feel free to come to me.
First of all, I don't care who you date. Girl, boy, or anything in between...as long as that person makes you happy and you're able to do the same. With that being said, I'm just going to use the pronoun "she" and "her" to make things a little less confusing....and I have some suggestions about how to make your person feel special.
Tip #1 - Put some god damn effort in/GOOGLE: It's not hard to Google. Well, I'm not sure if Google will even be a thing in 15 years BUT it is now so this is what I'm going with. Google is a search engine that works wonders. Do you have a question? Google it. Do you need advice? Google it. Do you need to get suggestions for nice date spots? Google it. It's quite simple actually. Even just taking a minute to search "fun date ideas in SD" will provide you with tons of answers! Once you've found an event/idea/location you like, put a little spin on it. For example, if you think the girl you're dating would like Mission Bay, order some Subway sandwiches before you head out and bring a blanket. BAM!!! It's a romantic picnic and look... all for about $12! (Not counting inflation by the time you read this). The little things in life also are very important. Include little surprises here and there. Make her feel like you're trying. A note or a flower on her car. Bring the romanticism. Who knows, maybe you're a 300 lb wide receiver right about now but I know deep down inside you want to be romanic and make her feel special.
Tip #2 - PDA: I think we can all agree that public displays of affection can go one of two ways. It can either be cute OR you might feel like taking a shower after seeing it. I'd go with the cute one. This means holding hands, a kiss every now and then or a shoulder lean. What do all of these have in common? Touch and showing off the fact that you like this person enough to show the world. Who wants to feel like they're embarrassed of the person they're with? No one! So don't be shy and take your girl's hand or throw that arm over the shoulder.
Tip #3 - Meet her life: What do I mean by this Eli? Well, when you describe your life, I'm sure you talk about your likes, hobbies, friends and family and if you're serious about a girl I'm sure you'll want her to be a part of some of your life. The guy I was just dating for 4 months had me meet 1 friend and we literally did NOTHING. I couldn't stand it anymore. I kept asking him to come to events I was going to and meet my friends but every time he was *cough* *cough* "not feeling well". I was being hidden and that doesn't make anyone feel special. One thing I'm sure your mom will teach you is inclusion! Everyone deserves to feel wanted.
Tip #4 - Make them a priority & think: Boys are dumb. I really hope you're not but I'm going to assume you'll be a normal teenage boy who doesn't get hints so my suggestion to you is THINK! Before you go on a date think about the girl. What would she enjoy? Even if it's just a movie and it starts at 6pm, think about food. Will you get food there or should you eat before hand. BUT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DON'T EAT BEFORE SHE GETS THERE AND THEN OFFER HER YOUR LEFTOVERS! Let me tell you a little story. This past gentleman I was dating thought it was a good idea to ask me to the movies after work around 6:30pm. I hadn't eaten since lunch and he knew that but he was hungry. So I got to the movies (located next to the food court) and saw him eating fries. He looked at me and said "want one? I already ate my meal". F THAT! How rude! I was thinking *Yes, that's exactly what I would like after a long week is a beautiful meal of a fry....I'm stuffed*....said no one ever! Anyways, think about the girl and what would be the right thing to do.
Tip #5 - Be the safety blanket: Most girls want to feel safe and this doesn't mean you have to go to the gym and start lifting weights. This just means she wants to feel comfortable and liked/loved. Spending time with the person you're dating is important. The person I was just dating didn't spend more than 3 hours with me at a time. He wasn't making us a priority and that sucked. Just realize people are sensitive and want to be romanced, pursued and cuddled. Make your girl feel secure that she's the only one for you and tell her she's beautiful.
Now, all of this to say you're actually liking the person. I'm not saying, do this for EVERY SINGLE girl. These tips are for someone you're consistently dating...someone you're exclusive with. You gotta vet her first; make sure she's not bat shit cray. And I obviously have more tips like have open communication and be honest and all that but that's for another letter at another time. This is just about making her feel some type of way about you. And she needs to put in the effort too. No one is perfect but you can try to be perfect for each other. Dating is a two way street and you need to be willing to drive with the other person.
In conclusion, I hope you have fun, are respectful and come out with some awesome stories :)
I don't know you yet, but I already love you and can't wait to finally have a man in my life that I love unconditionally.
Love,
Auntie Sarah
Don't forget to like my Instagram page @TheUnitedDatesOfSarah
